If You Could See Me Now
by resonatethroughtime
Summary: Mr Gold deson't believe in love. To help him understand the value of it, heaven sends him Belle, and angel, destined to assist him in finding someone. But then Mr Gold falls in love with his angel.


**Notes at the end**

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**If You Could See Me Now**

**_Chapter One_**

Mr Gold didn't believe in love. Love was an illusion for the gullible, a made up idea that humans liked to believe in for whatever reason, but one that didn't truly exist.

Hate and fear on the other hand were very real. Mr Gold came across those emotions every day. He could see them clearly in the eyes of all the residents of Storybrooke when they looked at him, whether he was simply walking to his shop or collecting the rent.

That was, all the residents except one. Sister Astrid never looked at him with fear or hate. Wariness perhaps, but nothing more. She was an odd one, far too cheerful for her own good and terribly absent minded. She would lose her own head if it wasn't attached to her body.

Mr Gold had just returned from seeing her about the rent for the convent. As usual she had lost the money, and he had to waste precious time standing around waiting for her to find it. Usually these visits were tedious at best, but today's had been unsettling.

He locked the shop door behind him, going to the room in the back to make himself a cup of tea and to try and forget the conversation he had just had with her.

_"I have been praying for you Mr Gold" she said, as she fished around through each desk draw looking for the rent money, clearly trying to make small talk._

_"What on earth for?"_

_"For your happiness Mr Gold. You seem sad. No one should be sad."_

_"I am not sad, and I don't need someone praying for me thank you all the same." _

_"What about loneliness? You must be lonely living in that big house all by yourself?"_

_"I'd rather live alone than have to deal with a distasteful tenant."_

_"I didn't mean a tenant Mr Gold, I meant someone for you to love, and who could love you back."_

_"But dearie, love does not exist."_

_Astrid looked at him in horror, finally with the rent in hand. "Surely you don't believe that Mr Gold?" _

_"Ah but I do. Now if you'll excuse me dearie, I must be off." He grabbed the money out of the nun's hand and headed for the door._

_"I will continue to pray for you Mr Gold," she promised._

_"If you wish to waste your time then so be it," he replied as he closed the door behind him._

Reflecting on the conversation, Mr Gold realised that he had never had someone show any sort of concern for him before. It was strange.

She could pray all she wanted though, no one would be listening.

Pouring his tea, he relished the feel of the warm porcelain against the palms of his hands. It had been a cold and rainy day, and the night probably wouldn't be any better. He planned to record the rent money, put it in the safe and then head home.

It wasn't until he turned around to his work desk that he finally noticed the woman standing in the doorway to the back room of his shop, with a curious look on her face. He started, dropping his teacup and spilling tea all over the floor.

Mr Gold swore, something that he didn't do very often, and went to grab his cane. The woman was on her knees in a matter of seconds to pick up the teacup he had dropped. He could hear her mumbling apologies but he just continued to stare at her.

She had the cup in her hands, holding it up so he could see the little piece that had broken out of it. "It's chipped," she said and rose the cup a bit higher. "I'm so sorry for startling you, I didn't mean to. I was sent to…to find you and…gosh, the first thing I do is break something. But you can hardly see it!"

"It's just a cup," he said as he rose from his chair.

He could see the relief in her eyes as she stood up again and placed the cup on the little table next to her, smiling at him.

"You are- you are Mr Gold aren't you?"

"Yes I am. And who exactly are you dearie, and what are you doing back here?" He had locked the front door hadn't he?

Another smile lit up her face. "I'm Belle and as I said, I was sent to find you!"

"By who? Who sent you?"

"They did. They heard Sister Astrid's prayers."

"Who heard what?"

"_They_, the angels! They had heard Sister Astrid's prayers and so they sent me to help you find love."

That again. Love. Why was it that everyone around him suddenly spoke of it? It wasn't even near Valentine's Day (it was autumn), so there was absolutely no reason for everyone to suddenly be talking about that ridiculous idea.

He sighed.

"Listen here dearie. I really don't have time for this and I was about to close the shop and head home, so if you want to buy something, make it quick. And if not, then would you kindly make your way out of my shop right now and stop wasting my time with this silly nonsense!"

"But Mr Gold I-"

"_Are_ you here to buy something?"

"I…no."

"Then I suggest you leave. I really don't have time for this." He turned around to pack up a few things and when he looked back over his shoulder, he saw that she had gone. He let out a sigh of relief.

What a strange woman. He didn't recall having ever seen her before, and she was definitely not one of his tenants. She must have been from out of town. Storybrooke was so small that everyone knew everyone else, and he most certainly did not know her.

And besides, a woman as beautiful as her was not easily forgotten.

He picked up the little teacup, examining the chip. Perhaps he could still use it, it was only a small chip.

He rinsed the cup and placed it back next to the teapot where it belonged. He quickly put the uncounted rent money in the safe, gathered up some of his paperwork to take home with him and then headed towards the shop door.

But when he tried to open it, he realized that it was locked.

That wasn't possible. How could that woman have gotten in and out of his shop when the door was locked? There was no way she had a spare key. There was only one key to the shop, and it remained in his pocket at all times.

He felt a coldness rush over him when he realized that he had never heard the bell over the door ring when she had entered and exited the shop.

He took a shaky breath, trying to calm himself and collect his thoughts. She must have just been a figment of his imagination or a trick of his mind. That was all.

She was far too beautiful to be real, plus there was no such thing as ghosts.

And angels certainly did not exist.

He blamed that damn nun and her fanciful ideas for this. He pondered whether suing a nun for emotional distress was a bit too immoral, even for him. He would have to sleep on it.

He unlocked the shop door and made sure to lock it again behind him. Standing outside he breathed in the cool air, and decided that it was best if he thought no more on this night, hoping that it was not a sign of things to come, that he was starting to lose his mind. He drove home and went straight to bed, feeling that the sooner this day was over the better.

But unfortunately sleep evaded him. He tossed and turned, until he knew it was well into the early morning hours.

Eventually he fell asleep, but it was not a restful one. It couldn't be, not when all he dreamt about were haunting blue eyes staring back at him.

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Thank you for reading the first chapter of "If You Could See Me Now". **whatisthisautumnsorcery** and I are writing this together and we're excited to continue with this. Reviews are always appreciated and make us happy and Rumbelle naked *wink wink*

Disclaimer: This is inspired by the book "If you could see me now", but we altered it a lot to our desire.  
The characters and anything else you notice belongs to abc.


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